I am a sucker for moments.

Ok. Ok. This is the thing. I'm in my double-deuce year of being alive. I made it to this point and I have never felt more positive about my life and the people I choose to be around. These people? They're my friends and I love them for all of the positive shit they give me as well as all of the shitty shit. This isn't intended to be sappy or anything like that, but I am a sap.

Right now, right this moment, I'm listening to Godspeed You! Black Emperor. It's been about a year since the last time I've listened to them. This last time was in some boy's studio apartment and I was getting dressed to go, making a decision to leave and talk about epic, sweeping music for such a pivotal moment in my life, a moment where I did not yet but was beginning to realize that how I see the world, what I value as important, and just all of that ambiguous, hard, growing up type of business is so...different. I don't know how to explain or articulate this and I often wonder if perhaps I could build something, create a physical thing and present to the world as Here, Here Are My Thoughts and Feelings and How I Have Changed and How I Have Realized Now That Shit is Going to Hurt But Whatever Because I Am Doing This and I Am Owning Up to It All.

And Godspeed? Yeah, I honestly can't think of any other music right now that I should be listening to. It's a band that feels like that thing that was created to articulate these hard to put into words moments. It's like, man, I am so psyched on everything right now and I figuring out which moments were dips or pitfalls, ends and beginnings, and all of that and I feel lucky. Goodbye, 21. You've been gone for a few weeks now, but it's ok. I learned a lot and 22 is starting off on this note, an imperfect note, but the right note. There is all of this awesomeness and I see no walls. I see expanse, great, big wide expanse for happiness, for sustained awesomeness. I see it. Really, really see it. I needed that first heartbreak, those wordless moments, all of it, to see this right now. What is this? Optimism? I don't know. Whatever it is, this gumption to be AWESOMEEEEE is really fucking good. And new. Oh, how new this all feels.

maybe it's because i say "straight up" all of the time now

I twittered this the moment it happened because Twitter is the most addicting social networking whatever thing in the world. Plus, it's really easy now with my Blackberry. My beautiful, beautiful Blackberry that lights up every single time I get an e-mail. It's great. Technology is suffocating me with awesomeness.



A friend and I were watching "Forever Your Girl" when he turned to me and said, "You remind me of a young Paula Abdul."

That's the best thing anyone's said to me in a long time. Never mind that I'm about half-a-foot taller than that dancing fairy of a woman and I am sometimes too uncoordinated to walk in snow let alone execute some sweet moves, I was tickled by that. As we all know, young Paula is the best Paula.

Saddest Song in the World

If I were a wee bit more of a girl, I would cry every time I hear Patsy Cline's "She's Got You". Part of it is because Patsy dies soon after this song but mostly it's straight up sad.



The musical theme of the day at work was "The Most Depressing Songs Ever" when we came across this. It broke my god damned heart, that's what this song did. I came home and realized I didn't have any Patsy Cline but I did have an inferior cover by Cat Power. Inherently, covers would be inferior. I can't imagine this song without Patsy's voice.

A friend showed this to me recently because his GF had this gem on vinyl (I like that 2k9 has turned into the year of records already). Initially, I was very much, "Well, isn't that cute." Then I woke up one morning with it stuck in my head. It may be better than Madonna's original. This is endearingly earnest. I require a vacation and a dance party.

Here's a link to the Wiki page to MC Miker G & DJ Sven. It's the most effort I can put into finding info right now because I am a bag of internet lazybones.

crowd following

Everyone's psyched on the new Animal Collective record and I am, too. I am not a liar. I love this band. I have standard taste, mostly. Oh well. It's difficult to pick my favorite track so here's the one that stands out the most, especially if you're living in frosty Chicago, never mind all of the sappy stuff it reminds me of. The sappy stuff that was and the sappy stuff that will be. WHY AM I STILL HERE? Maybe time to dig up a new city but who knows. The summers here are too good to let go.

Animal Collective - Summertime Clothes

I miss this past summer. I miss not being able to fathom hoping that the temperature goes above 0°F. I miss sweat and bicycles and humidity and shorts. I miss seeing my friends more often because who spends summer alone, you know? My skin is dry like something fierce. I miss summer. But I do love winter, much as a gripe, except for when new frontiers of cold keep on happening.

Man, this was kind of an echo of a post.

First Day of Winter Jam

麵包超人 (アンパンマン) "ANPANMAN" the Azuki-Bean-Jam Bun Superman thanks to Spitzgogo_CHEN

Chicago's all like, "Whoaaa, happy winter, suckers!" It's -4 degrees outside with a wind chill of something negative ridiculous and I don't know why I live here. I would very much like to wear my bathing suit around (totally ignoring my chubs, duh) and lie down on beaches and climb hills and ride bikes and stuff when I get trapped like this in my apartment.

Twice As Much & Vashti Bunyan - The Coldest Night of the Year

This is easily the coldest day of the year and I am glad I don't have to be outside. Happy winter, friends. I was saving this song until the first day of winter. Maybe I manifested this horrid weather. Guys, I'm sorry. Mostly, I'm sorry that I missed the Muppet Christmas Special. Bless you, internet.

Done

College. For now.

What's up, post-collegiate life? It's been quiet.

I eff around on the drums at work on a semi-regular basis and let me tell you, I can't keep a beat to save my life, post-collegiate or otherwise, but it doesn't matter. Drum Kit is my new BFF.